All the pain.

Following on from last week with the whole nerve damage, obviously it was a great pain in the butt, but not anything like what it would soon turn into.

 I started getting this horrible pain in my legs while I was visiting family in Canada, not only the pain but horrible swelling too, so much so that I would have to lay on my back with my legs in the air for 20 minuets or so just so I could get my jeans off. At the time I didn't think much of it, Calgary is at a different altitude then England so swelling is more likely to happen.
 But the pain got worse and by the time I got home it had traveled into my hips and lower back. I went to my doctors to see if they could help. I was very lucky my doctor took me seriously, kept sending me for every test and scan that was out there to try and find out what was wrong. In the mean time the pain kept growing, my skin got so very sensitive, I could barely stand anything to touch my legs at all. It traveled up my back and around my ribs, I had to stop wearing wire rimmed bras turning to bikini tops instead as they could be loosed, and I stopped eating.
 It hurt to eat, no just aching but horrible stabbing every time I ate anything solid. I had to make do with supplemented drinks, although they hurt too it was nothing like when it was solid. Because of this I lost a lot of weight.
 We finally found out that I had Fibromyalgia which is a disorder characterized by widespread pain in the fibrous tissue and muscle often accompanied by chronic fatigue.
 By the time I found out I was bed bound. Couldn't walk without crying and defiantly couldn't walk on my own, even to walk 2 meters to the loo I had to have a walking stick and half the time someone to lean on. I could no longer have baths (it has taken me years to be able to have a normal bath, although the water that feels very hot to me, feels quit cold to normal people) and I wasn't aloud to be alone when I had a shower, just in case.
 All of that was very annoying, especially the food, but the most frustrating was the walking, it hurt so bad and I couldn't go far, a change of scenery was to hobble from my bedroom to my mum to watch TV.
 The doctor put me on very strong painkillers and sensitivity tablets, which helped a lot, which in turn gave me the strength to try and walk further each day and soon short distances without help. The thing with Fibromyalgia is that yes it hurts, hurt sooo bad, but the more you move the less it hurts over time. You have to be willing to put your mind to it and get over that initial hump of pain to get started, but it's all up hill from there.
  I did have my own walking stick for a long time (all decked out of course) and for the longest time I did have to lean on someone for support, but 3 years after I was diagnosed (we had moved house by then) I was walking past one of the charity shops that was looking for volunteers and decided I'd had enough and went in to apply.
 For the next year I worked for a hour 3 times a week, walking in and back home to get myself stronger and ready to go back to work. It hurt and it took everything I had to keep going in but a little over a year from my start I got a normal retail job.
 I still have my bad days and I still hurt after a long day of work, that will never go away, but I no longer need the help of a walking stick or a person to lean on when I walk, recently I've only had one horrible day where I couldn't go to work. I've a normal diet (although once I did started to eat normally again I gained a lot of weight) and unless it is one of those absolutely horrible days I don't need to use my meds anymore, which is so rare now and the only real skin sensitivity I have now is water temperature.

 It's a horrible thing to have and I will never be rid of it, but it is manageable, it is so easy just to give up and give in to the pain, but you can't do that to yourself. I did later find out that because of the nerve damage I had that triggered something that brought on the fibromyalgia. I am still very grateful to my doctor though, because he kept on looking and he believed me, not a lot of doctors believe in fibromyalgia although more do now then they did.